Prayer, meditation, mantras, affirmation, self-help, selfless, inner-child healing, Ascended Master helpers, drama therapy, laughing yoga, somatic recalibration, talk about it, let it go, put yourself first, get out of yourself, surrender, fight the good fight, fake it ‘til you make it, authentic living, everything is as it should be, no woman, no cry.
These rituals support us – give us peace and grace. They make life, in all its hell and glory, possible.
Thank you. Thank you.
The day comes for all of us seekers when the acts we rely on for expansion and serenity, threaten to become scaffolding on a quivering, crumbling sense of self, festering with the denial of unfelt emotion.
Previously unwilling, unaware, or unable, the day always comes when we wake up to the inevitable flames of pain licking at our heart.
Today might be the day- the day to burn it all down – to set the spiritual façade ablaze and get right the fuck to the heart of it – to embody the rage, the grief, the pain, the sadness, the hopelessness, the dejectedness, the sorrow, the fear, the uncertainty, the mother fuck what the fuck why on earth cauldron of hot, boiling flammable emotion that will no longer be denied by affirmations or another round of soothing breath, exhaling it all away.
The day comes when that next round of breath is best used to fan the fucking flames, to manifest enough kinetic power to collapse the structure, to scream and sob and wail, to sing and shake and finally explode into a million fragments of winged white hot light that shoot into the pink and golden sky.
Today’s the day to let the scaffold around your anger, sadness, grief, rage, hopelessness and fear, burn the fuck down.
Let it burn to experience all the facets of your divine nature.
Let it burn to purify, refresh, to make an offering.
Let it burn and know your Destroyer Power. Let it burn and know your Infinite Creative capacity.
Let it burn because you need the energy.
Let it burn because repressed rage and grief lead to weird shit and misery.
Let it burn because no one and no thing creates your emotions. Emotions just are…vibratory states, pinged by circumstance, calling out to you to give them room to dance.
Let it burn – not because you want to be done with emotion (there is always more where that came from) – but because you want your money’s worth from this human journey that you so courageously and eagerly jumped into.
Let it burn because the fire won’t hurt you – denial and constriction will.
Let it burn for your Sacred Heart.
Let it burn for the collective human consciousness so frightened by the denied internal landscape of rage and sorrow we’re still manifesting an external learning experience wrought with hate, injustice, blame, violence and fear.
Let it burn because the fire works quick.
Let it burn because you are that safe. Let it burn to know how fucking big the God Goddess Spirit Source Light within you is – that She is so fierce, friendly and patient that she will ride with you the entire way. So expansive, She is every wave on the ocean of your fire. She is the peaceful joy waiting for you when the flames die down. She is You.
There comes a day, (HERE IT IS!) when it is no longer acceptable or healing to bypass uncomfortable emotions deemed wrong, inappropriate or scary, for reasons of spiritual poster-child-ness, keeping the peace, or looking professional.
Let it burn.
And when the smoke is gone and Brother Wind clears out all the ash, and you create everything you want by the fire of your heart, we’ll be there to pray and chant with you, to giggle, to breathe to give thanks with you, to bow to you, bow to Creation and all our Guides, embodying the SPIRT of LOVE that WE ARE.
Everything else is welcome to burn.
Wylder and Wylder, I walk the way Faith moves me, human undressing into Spirit.
Sometimes my heart sings songs I ache to hear. And sometimes, she sings songs calling me to stretch into the dark.
I give birth to my dreams before I understand what they are.
I follow the call of my name before I know where she’s headed, forging my Wylder way to the unspeakable sound of my heart, dropping veils of fear behind me like dandelion seeds.
I am Wylder.
Today it really sank in.
When I do what I love, how I love to do it, it feels really good. It goes really good.
Last night we had a fabulous Tiny Sacred Circle…something I was called to put together and did, using my own imagination, desires, space and strengths. I arranged the evening with two guidelines: what was easy and what felt good. Cozy space, flowers from the neighborhood, a couple of candles, crystal friends all around, tea kettle on, baby sleeping, and a quick prayer that we all shine. And shine we did!Five of us women sang, breathed, shared, and expanded and… I felt right on for most of the evening (aside from the song I suggested we jam along to which had a complex beat none of us could follow…awkward! It made for a good laugh in the end).
As I facilitated, I could literally feel my cells vibrating, my whole being activated. I was lit up. I felt powerful, graceful and at ease. I was doing what I am meant to do.(What I do, by the way, doesn’t need a title – by my own decree. But, if you must, I’m a healer coach teacher writer artist working with women on the edge of knowing. Officially, I’m a Light Caster.)
In his F A B U L O U S book, The Big Leap, Gay Hendricks encourages working from what he calls our Zone of Genius. The word genius comes from the Latin for ‘attendant spirit present from one’s birth, innate ability or inclination.’ Our genius is who we are born to be, our unique core essence. And each of us has a unique genius that no one, not before, and not after will have. It is our gift – the gift that goes both ways, fulfilling our deepest desires AND serving the world in the special way only we can. This is the Queen’s gift.
If you feel like you’ve heard this message, but don’t really believe living from your heart, your genius is practical, but really want to believe that your genius is really the way to go, join the club. It’s a rare bird who doesn’t, at some point, wait to make their big move before seeing how it’s done first, politely requesting permission from the powers that be, forgetting that the Power is inside of them, apologizing for their incredible brightness along the way, settling for close enough at every turn. I’ve certainly sported those feathers. And so I know, ignoring instincts, shelving natural gifts, poo pooing dreams is Painful. And if we’re awake, it’s unsustainable.
Last night confirmed things I’ve known in my heart since I was a tiny girl. For whatever reason (Motherhood? Years of spiritual searching? Kundalini rising? A slew of incredible women teachers in my life this year? Tired of for permission? Lack of sleep?) I’m ready to share my Genius with the world. I’m doing what I do best, sharing my heart with you.
I’m working on a very special online offering, set to launch this fall, for all the Queens, ready to be Lit Up, ready to feel Golden and Guided in all parts of their life, ready to embody sovereignty.
We’ll dance with themes of divinity, femininity, alchemy, affluence, emotion, desire and joy, and practice practice practice transmuting shadow to light. I’m cooking up videos and tools (pragmatic, creative, Super Woo) that will transform. We’ll enjoy a private forum where members can freely share as much or as little of their journey as they want, discuss, ask, give and receive and I’ll host Q+A sessions throughout.
This course will activate the Queen essence that is every woman’s birthright.
And as you can see from the picture of today’s office, I’m committed to creating this course the same way I hosted last night…with ease and from my heart. When traditional drafting formats left me hitting walls, I asked, ‘What feels good? What’s easy?’ and my brainstorming took flight with word art (something I’ve loved my whole life and always naturally done) and coloring. When I heard Mother Nature’s call during office hours, I listened and we jammed. Needless to say, the content is flowing and I promise, it is going to be amazing.
See the Golden Glimmer on my computer (whose name happens to be Goldie!)?
We’re coming at you, all Lit up, carrying messages of Joy and Love.
Registration for the course will open in September. We’ll be entirely virtual so women all over the world can participate. Members can move with the group or at their own pace and will have access to the queenly content forever. You’ll be the first to hear about it here.
If you know any Queens who are ready to cast their Light and need a safe, open ladyship to evolve and practice with, please share this with them. If you’re not already on the list, head over to fayegaulthirsch.com and sign up to hear details as they roll out.
To all the beautiful men, while this course will be women only, I’m so grateful for your support. The rolling, wild feminine river needs the sturdy river banks to guide her.
Meanwhile, thank you. Thank you thank you thank you.
I send blessings for all that your heart desires.
We Queens (and Kings) are co-creators of our existence. Our thoughts, words, actions and attitudes inform the Universe and its beings how to communicate with us. When we let the Queen set the tone, we honor her wisdom. She is loved. She thrives. No room for misogyny here.
Do’s and Dont’s
- Begin and end with thank you. All the time. No matter what. When we give thanks, especially for the tough times, we cultivate faith in our path. We naturally relax. Gratitude expressed opens the universal gates of abundance. Here lives the Goddess.
- Don’t talk about your body. Especially piece by piece. Unless of course you’re praising her for all of her phenomenal abilities and her incomparable beauty. Body gossip turns the wheel of female objectification. Spare yourself…your Queen is listening. See Part 1 for more on this.
- Don’t talk about her body. Cut out ‘you look so thin!’ or ‘that top really shows off your arms,’ ‘you’re so lucky you have/don’t have boobs’ or ‘she’s so brave to show off her round figure like that.’ These BS niceties affirm programmed, commercialized standards of beauty, tightening the valves on the pressurized cage of outward gaze women endure every day, discounting our natural inner desire-driven flow. Likely, if you’re inspired to talk to a woman about her appearance, your brain is signaling that heart is drawn to hers. Strike up a conversation! Connect! Give genuine, holistic compliments. You are so beautiful! How are you? You’re glowing! I’m so happy to see you! What’s up?!
- Ditch ‘I’m sorry.’ Beware the trendy habit of squirting this blanket diminishing phrase out, left and right, not because of real wrong doing, but rather, for walking down the sidewalk at the same time as another human being, asking a question, misunderstanding, disagreeing, requesting – for a changed mind, an opinion stated, air breathed, the discomfort of another. Constant apologizing does not present as considerate, kind, demure and easy going, but masks/illuminates insecure fear, while laying a trip on the people around us. ‘I’m sorry’ all the time deepens shame-filled, perma-wrong vibes. Never apologize for letting the Queen lead with deep presence and grace. Side note: sometimes ‘I’m sorry’ is a must. If you really mess up or hurt someone, apologize and quickly make it right as best as you can. Show more than you tell. Save it for the right time. ‘Excuse me’ and ‘Pardon’ work great in moments of infallible collision.
- Take impeccable care of yourself. First. Your self-care reflects in the universe. Though there’s no reason to wait for complete wholeness to help (complete wholeness is an illusion anyhow…we’re always transforming and we’re whole even when we’re broken), we cannot offer much to others unless we are well ourselves. What heals in you, heals in the world.
- Be clear. Be brief. Be yourself. There’s no need for the Queen to explain herself. Unless there’s a funny, life-affirming story involved. Brevity and clarity clear space for connection, action, joy. Yes, please. No, thank you. I’ll get back to you, thanks. I don’t like that. I love this. I love you. I want this. I can help you. I’m not available. Please stop. I’m finished. I’m leaving now. I’ll try this one. I’ll be there at 3:00. Can you help me please?
- Eyes up. Attunes with the big picture, connects with people, expands awareness, relieves cell-phone/device addiction, increases potential. Eyes up reminds others of their light. Eyes up invites the Universe to delight you. It’s waiting to be noticed!
- Boobs up. Opens the lungs and heart, improves posture and organ function, relaxes face and shoulders, protects natural spinal curvature, relays confidence and love, looks good.
- Arms down. Relaxed arms (uncrossed, off the hips) opens and softens the heart, encourages trust in the Universe. Queen tone is wisely inviting. She’s got the goods to energetically protect herself without being standoffish or rude.
It’s been said in a thousand ways…the best place to change the world is inside of me. This has been a tough truth for me, one that I’m sure will keep reiterating itself as I g(r)o(w). And yet, it is so empowering. Cultivate the (loving, creative, fun, mysterious, educational, connecting, playful, safe, gorgeous, communal) world I long for in me, and I’ve got what I want. Queen Love. Inside of me. Wherever I go, whoever I’m with. Totally protected, totally contagious.
To be clear, the Queen’s tone is not Bitch Tone. It’s straightforward, thoughtful, clear, joyful and loving. It is guided by confidence in her deep, authentic desire.
You’re a real Queen for making it through a three part blog on ending misogyny! You’re a real Queen because you say you are. Amazing!
How has misogyny ended in you? We’d love to hear from you in the comments section. And of course, this Queen would be honored if you shared this with your Queen community.